But first we check in with NeNe who seems to be the happiest Housewife on the block these days. She's splitting her time between Atlanta and LA and Gregg wants a piece of the action.
He'll move to LA, if NeNe will give him a key to her place, and her heart.
Minus 18 because Gregg really knows how to ramp up the cheesiness. He's wooing her with bad poetry and interrupting her pedicure so he can rub and kiss her feet. Down boy. Someone please make him stop.
Later NeNe heads to NYC doing some publicity for her sitcom The New Normal and Cynthia tags along. Cynthia lived in New York before she had two dimes to rub together so she's shocked that NeNe has never ridden the subway.
Plus 12 for taking NeNe on the grand tour and Cynthia's right…those six inch spiked heels are not subway friendly.
The cutest moment was when a bunch of students from a performing arts school recognized NeNe from her work on Glee. Plus 15. Ms. Leakes was gracious and encouraging and seemed to enjoyed the encounter as much as the kids.
Now if Cynthia could just get her to partake of that hotdog, maybe throw in a pretzel too we can make a real New Yorker out of NeNe yet.
Of course Phaedra's husband Apollo might not be too pleased with the New York street vendor diet. He just got certified as a nutritionist and physical trainer. Plus 8.
Apollo and Phaedra are now working on their donkey bootie workout video for women who need a little help getting a curvaceous bottom.
Phaedra describes Apollo's enthusiasm for the project as "Arnold Schwarteneager on bath salts" which is a little intimidating considering Phaedra's not looking to actually sweat during the workout. Minus 10. Who knows what they'll finally come up with.
Once again, Kim is barely on the screen except to make clear that she's pulling all of the "mother f**king flowers" she had put on the property out before she leaves. Minus 12. Since I doubt she'll be doing it herself I'm sure she'll be paying good money to have it done.
And Kandi's mostly missing in action as well as she packs up her awards to get the last of her things out of the old house as she moves one with the new.
Now on to Miss USA. First some background. Kenya shares with Phaedra that her mother is mentally ill. She gave Kenya up and has never acknowledged her. Kenya was raised by her grandmother. It's definitely a big issue for her and something that can still drive her to tears.
But any sympathy that garners gets tossed out the window once we spend some time with Miss USA from 1990-something.
OK, I'll admit that Porsha is a bit of a bubbly airhead who appears to have had everything handed to her and she should have known Kenya was a Miss USA, not Miss America. Minus 10.
But I have to think that she's not the first to make the mistake. You'd think Kenya would handle it with some grace. Ha!
Minus 20. Instead Kenya's got her nose so out of joint that she calls Porsha a "heifer" behind her back and leaves early. When Porsha comes outside to make sure everything is alright the insults continue to fly.
Kenya tells the camera that, "I will curse your ass out and keep on steppin'.'" So first she ticked off Cynthia and now she made an enemy of Porsha. That didn't take long.
Yes, that's our Miss USA. The epitome of grace and class…NOT.
Episode total = -35! Season total = -19!